Stressed, worried and desperate.


And no, it's not for exams. Those were looooong over. This, this is what matters. Our (goddamned) streaming choices.


I'm really curious as to why the government has to make us make such a huge decision so early in our life. At this stage, we know that the subjects we choose would affect our future. Not so much which career you would take, because not taking Physics now doesn't mean you can't be an engineer in future (though it would help). Not taking Literature doesn't mean you won't become a writer in future.

It affects our future, as to our credentials, our foundation. Say you made a huge mistake and picked the wrong combination for yourself. You fail, you do absolutely terribly, and so you don't go to a good JC, and end up not going to a good college. Some may be knocked down by this, and end up leading boring lives. But a special few would somehow pick themselves back up and shine, climbing up the career ladder at the speed of light. That's up to you of course, but for some, it'd just be much easier (and much more impressive) to be in top schools all through their education.


Back to the point.


Early decisions stress us out. We think too much, and we can't handle such big decisions. Not just because of our young age, but because we are teenagers! The age of which we are known to be rash, indecisive, unsure of what to do with our lives!


And now the argument would be, but you have parents that can guide you and lead you in making your choice.


MY argument is that my parents are foreign and did NOT study in Singapore with the British GCSE system, so they wouldn't know the procedure, and hence have almost absolutely no idea what to do as well. (In my case of course, the folks are trying their best to understand what the hell is going on. Appreciate the effort, but it's really annoying when you have to explain everything...) They might not even know how to calculate the bloody O level score!


So it sucks, sucks to have to choose at our age.


did i mention it also sucks to be the first-born of a family with parents who did not have the Singapore school system? Yeah it sucks big time.


Why? Because as mentioned, my parents have no idea what's going on. And secondly, being first-born, I don't know what the syllabus looks like, and what problems were faced and all that. Sure, I could have asked my seniors, but they aren't related to me, so they'd more likely be on a different brainwave frequency. Having an older sibling would have allowed me to see what went on in class, what changed between Sec 2, and Sec 3. Such an advantage that would have been.


Would have been, and will never be.


We're back to square one, I have a first choice in mind already. But what if I don't get into it? I don't have a back up plan. I have other combinations I'd like to consider, but I don't know which way to order them.


I'm worried, stressed and very confused.